A Thank You Note to Straight People

The Supreme Court’s decision legalizing same-sex marriage couldn’t have happened without straight people — and not just the five Supreme Court justices that voted in favor of it…

Thank you Straight People, Love, A Gay Dad

Dear Straight People,

Thank you. Thank you for cheering right alongside us as we in the LGBT community celebrate a newfound, long-overdue measure of equality. Thank you for the endless sea of rainbow-colored photos. Thank you for voting. Thank you for teaching your children (and sometimes your parents) that not every family is the same, yet deserving of the same respect. Thank you for telling them that whether they grow up to love the opposite gender or their own, you will still love them. Thank you for encouraging them to be whoever they were meant to be. Thank you for trying to understand and to learn. Thank you for asking questions, even if you don’t always have the right words. Thank you for being fair and equal in your schools, your jobs, your churches, and your neighborhoods. Thank you for defending us in a fight, even when we’re not around. Especially when we’re not around.

To friends, families, classmates, and coworkers: thank you for allowing us the time and space to come out — to know ourselves and to be seen, heard, and known on our own terms. We realize this is a journey for you, too; we will do our best to remember that.

On a more personal note, I count myself lucky that the majority of my family has stuck around since I came out 20 years ago. I love that you love my husband and my son, and your presence in our lives means the world to me.

I also want to voice my thanks to a specific group of straight people — the fathers I’ve met since starting this blog. Some of you I’ve met in real life; countless others I know only virtually. To varying degrees you’ve been sounding board and shit-caller, muse and motivator, confidante and comrade. You’ve made me laugh, cry, think, and scream — sometimes all at once. Thank you for being my friends, my brothers, my family.

More importantly, thank you for doing all you do as you raise your families — living your lives as fair-minded men. Among you are those with LGBT fathers and mothers, aunts and uncles, in-laws, siblings, children. Some of you live and work alongside many who are LGBT. For some, I was the first gay person you ever interacted with.

Regardless of your experience, that is how the world changes — people choosing to love and accept those in their everyday lives that have known hatred, rejection, and judgment elsewhere. This is how humanity grows, strengthens, and moves on from a history of bigotry and fear. So thank you for being the fathers that you are — and in turn, changing the world.

With much love & gratitude,
Designer Daddy

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Please take some time to read these stories from a few of my fellow blogging dads. They come from all over the US and beyond — each sharing their unique perspective and expeirence.

Aaron Gouveia, The Daddy Files
It’s No Longer Gay Marriage, Just Marriage

Adam Hall, Tenor Dad
The Bible is Not Against Gay Marriage, and Here’s Proof

Briton Underwood, Punk Rock Papa
Scar Tissue

Bruce Devereaux, Big Family, Little Income
The Rainbow Connection

Carl Wilke, Big Cheese Dad
I’m a Christian and I love gay people

Chris Bernholdt, Dad-n-Charge
Rainbows Bright

City Dads Group (various contributors)
On Same-Sex Marriage

Daniel Pelfrey, Post Post Modern Dad
Love Did Not Win

Dave Lesser, Amateur Idiot/Professional Dad
Marriage Equality and Loving the Sinner (I Don’t Mean the Gays)

David Cummings, The Unprepared Father
Lela, Let Me Explain Love

Derek Bremer, The Unfit Father
Congratulations LGBTs! It’s About Time (It’s Also Really Just the Beginning)

Doren Tripp, Grafted Identity
America the Loving

Joe Medler, Developing Dad
Pennants, Rainbows and Love

Joseph Mastropiero, Just Another Dad
Score One for Love

Justin Meyer, Dad on the Loose
On Marriage, Family, and the Rule of Law

Marc Mitchell, The Awesome Adventures of a Stay-at-home Dad
Equality for All!

Mike Reynolds, Puzzling Posts
How “Gay Marriage” Might Have Ruined our “Straight Marriage” in One Weekend

Neil Fein, Magnificent Nose
Good things happen, too

Philip Deatherage, Philip’s Free
Marriage Equality?

Roberto Santiago, An Interdisciplinary Life
Are You A Bigot? (A Simple Test)

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Thanks to Chris from Dadncharge.com for most of the collage images.

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